UMMMM That was Unexpected

I am thrilled to announce that tonight I kissed a man.

Yes, I did. My first kiss. And it was not just any kiss... it was right smack after this kind and worthy man laid his hands on my head and gave me a priesthood blessing.

Let me explain. This guy has been a good friend all summer. We officially had a connection when he told me was born in 1983, and I realized that I had 3 of those same numbers in common with him, except for the 8, which is a 9 in my case. Conversation ensued that night back in June when we discovered this connection we had, and he told me all about Lord of the Rings and more. We laughed. He's a nice guy, pursuing an advanced degree at a nearby university. But no, I was not interested, and quite frankly, neither was he. Totally fine.

I would like to report that these sentiments never changed over the course of the summer. We talked a grand total of probably 4 times at ward activities. He was always friendly. The relationship was always platonic. I realized I didn't know who my Home Teachers are and I wanted a priesthood blessing before I embark on this trek tomorrow on my own, and so I asked this kind, happy guy if he would be willing to step in and give me a blessing before I leave.

Being the nice guy he is, he agreed.

I went over tonight, before I went to the temple for my last temple trip this summer :'(

Naturally, I had to call 3 times to clarify directions and which apartment he lives in. Naturally, I came over when no one else was home. Naturally I awkwardly looked up just as he was laying his hands on my head, so his hands ended up resting on my face as he basically wiped my nose when I moved my head back to the right position, that is, straight forward. Naturally everything was made as subtly uncomfortable as possible for two people who hardly know each other but who feel positively towards each other nonetheless, and who have come together to do a good but comparably insignificant thing in regards to the course of their lives and the world as they know it. Naturally, all of the above awkward moments were moved past like small ruts in the road, unimportant and not big enough to really be a problem.

Well friends, that road full of ruts was suddenly blocked by an angry hippo when I stood up from the blessing, turned around to give him a hug, and neither of us could decide which way to turn our heads.

Yes, we did that awkward ostrich wiggle dance with our necks trying to get around each other, and we eventually came to a consensus to put our heads on the same side of the hug.

Faces forward.

Going in at full speed.

And then all subtlety erupted in a magnificent explosion of uncomfortable when contact was made between this young man's face and my own, and all hope of hopping on that hippo and smoothly riding out of the issue disappeared. That's right, people, the hippo ended up laying down in our path and playing monster truck rally, with our faces.

I would like to report that there is no solid evidence that lips met lips. However, the collision DID in fact occur, and I for one was down and out, bent in half laughing within .025 seconds of us finishing the 'hug.' This kind man tried to rescue me as he smoothed over the situation with grace and I snorted and talked about how this would be a story my grandkids would hear, and that that was THE awkwardest hug I had ever given. He nodded and said, "Yeah, it was definitely up there in the list."

A few moments later, I had regained my composure, and he walked me outside as I thanked him for his time and worthiness. He was gracious and said good bye, and I kept my cool until I sat down in the driver's seat and shut the door, at which point I pulled a good old 15-year-old-girl-after-a-dance move and called my good friend, immediately telling her the story with every hilarious detail. We laughed, needless to say.

Never will I be worried about a kiss being awkward again. I think I've covered that area down and back at this point. Lucky me.

Guess I couldn't be normal and have a first kiss that actually counted. Or leave San Diego without going out with an awkward moment that tops them all. Or leave the country alone still president of the VLC (Virgin Lips Club, Boise ID Chapter) (that title comes up under my name if you google me, PS).

I have to admit, I've never laughed so hard with someone I hardly know who is only slightly chuckling as I'm doubled over in hilarity. It's a good way to build a strong bond of... awkward. Yay for macking him if you want to, and even if you don't want to, you do it unintentionally. I've finally taken my brother's advice. He's got to be so so proud right now.

Had to go out with a bang, I guess. I'll miss you San Diego... Most of you, anyways.